Rockstar was the only Hindi movie I wanted to watch badly in 2011. And with much enthusiasm, despite reports of a sagging second half, I set out last weekend to watch it in Eros in Mumbai. Before anything else, it was a pleasure to not watch the movie in a multiplex – it’s been at least six years since I did so! The screen was huge. I was prepared to be blown away – with amazing visuals, and most of all, what I’d come for, Rahman’s music on dolby surround sound (which was surprisingly non-functional in the cinema, I think).

As for the movie – I’ll not talk about the script or the wooden doll Nargis Fakhri (why, Imtiaz Ali – she destroyed the very soul of the movie). To me, the movie did a brilliant job – thanks to Ali, a zillion times from the Rahman fan – bringing the god-awesome-brilliant-out-of-the-world songs to life on screen through Ranbir Kapoor. And is this the guy who was unbearable in Saanwariya all those years ago? Good lord, hasn’t he matured as an actor – this might very well be the break that he got hints of at Wake Up Sid. Thanks to him, the songs sprang to life, dripped with agony, pain, exuding promise, happiness, steeped in anguish, anger, oh-world-up-yours-ness. After watching Sakkarakatti, I realized how directors could mutilate songs on screen (remember the zombies in Chinamma Chilakamma) and make you relive horrific memories the next time you listen to them (it took me a few months to get over those images). Ali has simply made me cherish each song even more, feel the emotion in each song that Mohit Chauhan and Rahman create. After the movie, I became an even bigger fan of Kun Faaya Kun – the beautiful lights, the mosque, the haunting music on screen – love. At 3.15am, a few hours after watching the movie, I played it on the iPod on bed, lay with my eyes closed and – for the first time even though I’ve heard it before – moved to a different plane; one where Rahman’s voice felt as if they were ripples on water; the first bit on the harmonium with Javed Ali’s and Rahman’s voice felt like heaven; and when you realize how the divine sound awoke the music within JJ, Mohit Chauhan’s voice carries a meaning of its own.

And The Dichotomy of Fame – gave me a pleasant shock when I saw Shammi Kapoor playing the shehnai (yes, I could have made the link when he was introduced as a shehnai player) – but it became even more beautiful when Ranbir could so powerfully emote to show his anguish, pain and annoyance – and what, beautifully, brought out the best music in him. Aur Ho, a song I usually paid little attention, became a haunting portrayal of confusion, and knowing what those mysterious lines the lady sings are, makes it lovelier. Sadda Haq became powerful, and I was screaming with joy in the cinema hall. I love Sheher Mein even more, more deeply in love with Phir Se, and must seriously work on editing Tango for Taj my ringtone.

I’m so much more in love with the soundtrack that I don’t mind sitting through the movie again and enduring the pouting woman’s face, just to relive every song and watch Ranbir bring it to life. What more could a Rahman fan – and a true music lover – want?

I went in yesterday knowing that reviews said the movie wasn’t great, but I did expect some nice bits here and there and the music to make up for the disappointment that everyone had dubbed it to be. And well, at the end, I was as confused as the movie was as to how I felt about it!

Not all movies need to have stories – some get along just as well with lovely portrayals and bits – and while this movie did have quite a few of those, there was something lacking that made it fall apart.

It seemed like there was so much going on, so much that the director wanted to tell us, and unfortunately, his screenplay and editors wouldn’t let him do so, so he packed all he can that he thought made sense and put it in 2.5 hours. What a waste of stories/thoughts that could have really given us some poignant moments to take away from the movie?

Anyway, I’m sure the movie’s been hacked to death by many reviewers, but here’s what I liked:

1. Abhishek. Not only was he cute – the first ever time I have found him so! – I think he pulled off the American thing well. The good thing about his character was that he didn’t smirk or frown at the various things Indian – no ‘I have to carry this bucket into the bathroom?’ or ‘I want mineral water’ or unnecessary ‘In the US we do this-and-that’. He slipped easily into India and everything Indian, determined to have a good time. I wish someone had dubbed the American accent for him, though. Couldn’t pull it off.

2. The spontaneity with which Abhishek slapped the local inspector and landed in jail. The naivety with which he remarked ‘You are a public servant!’ which earned him the slap. No random huffing and puffing about India and stuff. Borrowing his oft-repeated phrase, ‘cool’.

3. Rehna Tu and Dil Gira. Very, very, lovely. Though I thought Rehna Tu was a song on the lady, it was a fresh idea to picture it on something else. Dil Gira.. was heavenly. I loved the colours, the painting-like-finish, and I’ve just fallen in love with the song even more.

4. Ali Uncle (Rishi Kapoor), Mamdu (I don’t know his real name) and Gobar (Atul Kulkarni). Among the few people in the movie that I thought had some strength to their characters.

5. The movement of the camera, be it jumping like the kaala Bandar or as Abhishek jogs through the street or the scene in the mosque that made me gasp in awe; the lighting that was so pleasant and complemented the mood and feel of each scene.

6. The way various things in Hinduism were portrayed, without making fun of them – the cow giving birth in the middle of the street (‘Mother cow giving Baby cow’) and how Waheeda Rehman is simply back to normal.

These are pretty much all I remember from the movie. The rest of it is a hazy hash of random things happening, sniggers from the cinema audience when people cried in the movie, and the other miscellaneous things that I cannot remember.

Sometimes, we make mistakes despite knowing they are wrong. This is called committing crime, and I recently did.

I watched Sakarakatti.

I’d read the reviews that had trashed the movie beyond repair, and I still went, believing Rahman’s songs in the movie will provide some respite and will be worth watching for. How truly mistaken!

This is by far the only movie I have seen that really doesn’t have a storyline. I mean, we all say that for many movies, but most have a fledgling storyline that at least has a teeny bit of logic, a sequence that at least exists for the namesake, a screenplay, however horrible it may be. This movie, didn’t have ANYTHING!

The movie starts off with a bunch of adigaprasangi kids that are wondering how to get girls to like them (at 10 years?? Why, oh, why?) and decide readings books on sex is the way to go. And suddenly, out of the blue, ‘Elay!’ starts. The song is one of the best in the movie, with such feel-good lyrics and when I used to listen to the song, I used to imagine a bunch of fervently-committed college kids who are do-gooders. What a waste singing it to kids who are busy ogling at girls! The brainless director wasted the lovely meaning of the song on kids and cartoons (speaking of which, what the hell was the genie doing? Why did the kids walk on the long log a la Lion King?) Argh! It irks me to see the songs wasted!

This is only the tip of the iceberg, really. The hero, a friggin’ 18-year-old is going way too far to prove his love to another equally dumb 18-year-old in college. And how does he fall in love with her? When he sees her cussing her driver when their car breaks down. Wow, so much for the guy for whom the Elay song is wasted. He falls for her looking at her swear and at her sexy short winter clothes that she wears in Chennai.

Add to this confusion another 18-year-old idiot, the hero’s cousin who comes from Coimbatore (and wears tanks, layers clothes, and what not!) and falls in love with the hero too. Why? Coz he sees her in a towel. I mean, even Annamalai was better coz Kushboo had a deeper reason to fall in love with Rajini :P

I’m not going to bother with the rest of the ‘storyline’ because there’s none. The only deepest regret I have is that I can’t listen to the songs of the movie now without remembering the damned graphics. Chinamma Chilakamma, and I remember the mummies and the long-toothed rakshasi that flies about for no reason whatsoever. I miss you da, and I remember weird space ships and the space scooters on which the Coimbatore girl and the hero fly (the hero is next to her in the song throughout, and yet she sings I miss you da when in real life, she is sitting next to him; I shouldn’t even bother finding logic, I know).

And Taxi, hahaha… they brought down French girls and got Blaaze to do the rap and this was the most sensible song in the movie! And for this reason, I think, they showed the song twice in the movie! For all the buddies that the hero has in the movie, he sings at some other guy ‘En uyir nanban nee thaane’.

Whatever. The only entertainment I got was with my friend when we roared with laughter every minute. My first tamil movie in a cinema after a year, and this is what I get. My bad!

When I got out of the cinema, I felt good about the movie. By the time I got back, I was madly in love with it!
What do I talk about - Rahman, or Gowarikar, or Hrithik or Ash or the numerous other things in the movie?!
I'm mad to the extent I immediately wanted to watch it once again - immediately! I tried to write something about the movie, but I didn't know what to write - it's not the case of words failing me, but more that I didn't want to write anything for fear I might say something and spoil the ethereal feeling around the movie... ah, brilliance!
Must, must watch.
It's a beauty, in every way.

Just a word of caution: Don't watch it with people who cheer and clap for the craziest things in the movie without realizing it's a period movie and the director's done a wonderful job of it. Or if you are someone like that, then don't watch it in the cinema. Because every time you cheer or jeer, there is someone like me angrily cursing you under her breath.

Saawariya? Nalla kaettan. Konnutan, SLB.
I have to warn you there may be spoilers ahead, and.. oh, wait... there's hardly any story. Never mind, just read on if you will.

Not so long ago, there was a director who made movies which were critically acclaimed, winning National Awards, and so on. And then he made Devdas, a glitzy, filled-with-grandeur-and-big-stars-and-similar-sounding-songs, nevertheless-wildly-successfuly movie, which (unfortunately) beat many other good movies to be India's selection to the Oscars. And he bounced back with Black, brilliance. And now he's back with a miserable fare, just yet.
For those of you who may not know yet, the story is an adaptation of Dostoevsky's 'White Nights', a short story written by him in 1848, of a young lady waiting for her lover to return. Right, it's a short story that has been tortorously stretched to a 2 1/2 hour movie by SLB.
For those of you who have seen Iyarkai in Tamil, trust me when I say that movie was a brilliant adaptation with the same storyline base. What a budding director could do in Iyarkai, SLB failed because of his emphasis on all the wrong things.

So where do I start? At the mind-boggling frequency at which the actors break into a song and dance, at the tenacity of the lead actor to irritate you with his I'm-like-your-son-Lillipop-trust-me and oh-I'm-happy-you-loved-me-at-least-for-a-moment-dear kind of dialogues (seriously, when will Hindi movies grow out of such sentiments??!!), at the sets that make me wonder whether the movie was set in Thailand (there's a huge Buddha) or Baghdad (the mosques a la the Alaadin cartoon's city) or the bars (as in the 1960s or 70s) and yet people appear to be speaking in a more contemporary tongue (I swear, Okay Bye and exchange contemporary Indian currency), or.. phew, you're getting tired, I know.

SLB might as well have made a theatre production instead of a movie! What's with all these sets? Always dark, gullies as in cities in India in the 70s, a picturesque bridge in the middle of nowhere, boats a la Venice taking people from one end of the water body (river? lake? *shrugs*) to the other, roads like in Rome with those huge stones and all, seriously, what was he thinking! It was beautiful in the beginning, and I was awed, but after 20 minutes, it seriously was becoming an eyesore. And the number of times it rained in the movie, oh my God! As my friend put it, 'I think this place is in Meghalaya!' And the shining bulbs and the artistic lighting - as friend said again 'They must have spent at least a crore on electricity alone!' (It's these comments that kept me up through the movie :) )

The hero, Ranbir Raj, 'you can call me Raj'. God, what an agony. Be it his sentimental dialogues, the irritatingly-sticky way he kept pursuing people, his constant talking, and not to forget his semi-nude dance in the towel (an item song for girls, as the friend put it) where he dangerously brandished his towel and let it slip so we could see his taut backside (excuse me!), he was unbearable throughout the movie. And uhh, he looks girly. If not for his semi-nude-towel-act, I wouldn't have gotten a very good opinion of him (nicely toned body! :P).
All the girl did was to cry or laugh like a maniac. I mean, she's worse than me when she laughs :) There's Rani Mukherjee too, as a prostitute, and SLB has spent in gorgeously making up all the women in the red light area, and making them look a little scary, too. There's Salman Khan too, and he looks like a terrorist. He's the mystery man, who impresses the girl because he's sitting in pouring rain and doing his namaz dutifully :) No, girls don't get impressed with just such things in life, before men start getting other ideas.

The music (except, probably, the title song) hardly stayed on in the mind. So much for the lead being a 'rockstar singer'. The dance sequences and songs, typical of Bhansali, were very grand and very theater-ish. Okay, I haven't really seen an opera really, but I've seen them on TV, and this is what they look like. I'm sure this was how Bombay Dreams would have been.

It's just sad that somebody capable of more than this has given such a disappointing movie. His movies, if nothing, at least had very strong characters - the brilliant near-childish and tenacious Ash in HDDCS and her slightly-anguished yet willing to bear it husband in Ajay Devegan, an egoistic drunk in Shah Rukh, a strong-willed deaf-mute-blind in Rani in Black, and of course Amitabh in the same - where did this strength go in this movie? The characters are weak, and not once are you able to sink in with them in the movie, or feel.

I have been really critical and all that, but seriously, I spent three hours on this when I had to be studying for exams, and it's totally not worth it. Sigh, how will I make up for these lost hours!

My advice: Don't spend your time. If you're really a grandeur fan, watch it on DVD later.