(A little entry inspired by a little spider who crawled on my notebook, while I was studying)

It took me a while to realize that the little grey thing moving on my notebook was not my imagination, but a spider. Scarily tiny, he looked so fragile.
My first impulse was to blow him off the paper. But I stopped myself, for he was more interesting to study than impact of globalisation on news reporting. He walked a bit, then paused. Walked. Paused. It looked as though he was searching for something in the vast forest of blue and black lines on paper. A place to spin a web, maybe? He should've been disappointed.
He never quit, though. Just when he had finished traveling the entire length of an A4 sheet, he started again in the diagonally opposite direction. His tenacity fascinated me - what did he want?
Just then, I sneezed.
I opened my eyes. He was nowhere to be seen. Futility of existence - his or mine?
Whew, finally. No more exams for at least a year! (Refer to last post for explanation.)
The exam on 'Information Visualization and Perception' was one of the funniest I've ever written in university. After having spent days preparing for it, I felt like how I used to in Class XI or XII, having no clue what I've studied, my mind foggy all over.
I proudly claimed 2 chapters weren't important - and guess, there were questions worth 50 marks (i.e. half of the marks allotted to the paper - I almost shrieked in the exam hall!!) from just those two chapters!! :O
Thankfully, the questions had some clue on what they were asking (err.. didn't I tell she was a bit, erm, you know!), you know, like 'What are the 3 primary colours? Explain with special importance to red, blue and yellow. (I mean, those are the answers!!)' Those kinds. So I made up answers based on these 'explain with reference to..' and so on. Fabrication, I can say, but basically it's all crap.
Turns out studying mass communication and the ability to write crap in blogs really helps. My answers were bloody correct! No, I don't claim to have intelligence that I can even answer questions from chapters I have no clue about, but it was luck, sheer luck. I even had no clue what I was answering (from my example, I wouldn't know what primary colours are, but just would know red, blue and yellow), so I have no idea how well I managed to connect the answer to the main topic. Oh well, who cares now.. I'm done, and I think it was ok. Looking at the faces of others taking the exam, I guess I was fine!
I had German yesterday, which was quite insignificant and even boring, that I just finished the paper and left early. I mean, it was fun to sit and recite lines like Kindergarten kids in level 1, but it got boring in level 2. I hope I sustain enough interest in the language to finish it with level 3 in my final year.
So, what now? I made the horrible mistake of watching 'Vallavan' yesterday after I got back. I'd already watched parts of the movie, and watched the last one hour yesterday. I think I have to reserve an entire post to bash up that idiot and how Tamil cinema has to really shake him up and ask him to be sensible in his characterization.
I just woke up after 9 1/2 hours of sleep, compensating for all those hours I lost out doing my projects during the semester. Sigh, feels good, now! I hope it lasts long and I don't feel really bored very soon!
To all guys writing exams, good luck, rock them!
Ever felt teachers/lecturers have no idea what they're teaching you? Oh well, I'm sure some of you feel that all the time.
For the first time after high school, I started studying a subject having no idea what on earth it talks about - Information Visualisation and Perception, which I took on as a General Elective. Now don't ask me why I took such a boring subject - the course description during subject registration cheated me. The description said that we'll study meanings of symbols or words in visualising information. Going by how much I love meanings and my interest in analysing what a word or visual is doing in this context, I registered for the subject - only to realise that the information they were talking about was the engineering information - damn it! And here I am, staring at powerpoint slide after slide, wondering what on earth the lecturer was thinking when she put these totally unconnected slides one after the other. Of the 15 lectures that were offered, I would have attended 5! Not that attending really makes a difference, because she puts on a microphone and mumbles whatever she's written on the slide.
Gosh, why are some people so bad at what they do? Why not instead do something they're good at? I'm sure this lecturer is brilliant with her research (maybe why my univ decided to take her in..) but she really has to learn how to teach!
Two more days to freedom from studies and exams for a whole year! My next sem is going to be completely devoted to a 6-month internship. Maybe I should enjoy writing exams, as I won't be doing so for another year! :D
I'm busy figuring out what to do for the December vacation I'm going to spend here - damn, I'm really going to miss home, India, Chennai, Ahmedabad and my cute neighbour kid! But I'm gonna be here for the famed Singapore Christmas! Let's see how it is..
Now that was enough entertainment for 15 minutes.
By the way, listened to Guru? Man, it's brilliant! A R Rahman rocks, totally!!!! Cheers!
Mina sighed happily, looking at her new gleaming fountain pen. For the umpteenth time, she turned it upside down, and saw the ink flowing and collecting at the other end of the ink barrel. She opened her new pencil case and placed it carefully inside, away from the two pencils, eraser (pencil and ink), sharpener and ruler.

As she excitedly looked forward to her first day in school of writing with a pen, her mother fervently prayed to God for all to go well.

Decked in a dashing white uniform, neatly braided hair, and new white canvas shoes, Mina kissed her mom goodbye and got into the school van.

When Mina reached school, she ran to meet her friends, all of whom were showing off their fountain pens to each other. Her pen elicited a ‘Oooh’ from her friends, who obviously found it impressive – it had a transparent body, was lavender in colour, and had a silver nib, while all of theirs’ had golden nibs.

Well, everyone seemed to realise it was a big day for the class III students of the school. Class V akkas and annas wished them good luck, while class IV ‘Seniors’ had a smug What’s-the-big-deal look. Teachers let the students clap for each other at the beginning of each lesson, and all students were extremely eager to write something even on the first day of school. Some students even insisted on writing the bio-data themselves, and ended up getting scolded for doing so. Mina was a well-behaved girl throughout, and secretly giggled with joy every time the nib smoothly flowed on the lined notebook paper.

Well, all did go fine till 2 pm in the afternoon, during the Social Studies class. The SST Ma’am had obliged to dictate something to them so that they could all write with their fountain pens, and was explaining the beginnings of the Mughal Empire by the side. At the end of the hour, just before the P.T. class began, Mina realised something cold on her left shoulder.

She looked, and to her utmost horror, found a large ink blotch on her left sleeve, a big, blue, ugly stain. As she came back to her senses after staring it for almost half a minute in unbearable agony thinking of what her mother would say, she turned back to see what was causing the stain, which was still spreading.

Somu had dozed off!!! The idiot had left his pen open in his right hand, which was stretched across his desk and reached Mina’s shirt sleeve.

‘Idiot!’ yelled Mina.
The whole class looked at her, shocked. SST Ma’am interrupted.
‘Mina, that’s a bad thing to say! Say sorry at once!’ she said.
‘I won’t! I won’t, I won’t!’ screamed Mina, in a blind rage of tears. ‘Look what he has done to my shirt!’
Somu was still sleeping, oblivious to the happenings. Vatsav, who was sitting next to him, nudged him awake. ‘Dei, get up da, ma’am is going to scold you!’

Somu woke up finally, dazed. Even before he could say anything, a fist came flying at his face from front.
He gasped. So did the whole class.
Mina had hit him – big mistake.

For when Somu woke up, he was terribly angry. Huge for his age, hitting him wasn’t something anyone would really want to do. Mina’s rage seemed to have confounded her senses as well.
When Somu stood up, though, Mina didn’t cower. She was completely ready to continue the fight. Just as she was about to grab him by his collar, the teacher interrupted.
‘Enough is enough! I shall not tolerate such behaviour in my class. Mina, get out of the class and stand there!’

Right then, the class bell rang. The whole class, as though the bell was the gong that woke them up, shook themselves off the whole episode and ran out to the grounds to play. SST Ma’am made sure Mina didn’t punch Somu on the way to the grounds, and even went and reported the incident to the PT Teacher.

It so happened that the PT Teacher like Mina more than Somu. Being the kind hearted woman she was, she let them play too, even though SST Ma’am had vehemently told her it wasn’t a good idea.
Oh, if only she knew. Within minutes of start of the class, Somu came and pulled Mina’s plaits in revenge. Mina ran forward and kicked him hard in his shin. In another two minutes, the two were on the ground, pulling each other’s hair, and kicking and punching, screaming all the while. It took the good natured PT Teacher almost five minutes to realise a commotion was going on – she was thinking a game was going on when a circle had formed in a corner of the ground with the children screaming ‘Go, go, go!’

She came running when she realised it was a fight, and dragged the two warring kids apart. Both were hurt and bleeding – Somu in his legs and elbows, Mina in her ankles, elbows and palms. By the time they got their first aid dressing, the bell rang and it was time for them to go home. The Head Mistress’ yelling was reserved for the next day.

When Mina reached home that evening, her mother nearly fainted of shock. The uniform didn’t just have the blue stain from the fountain pen on its left sleeve, a part of the right sleeve was torn, the shirt and skirt were brown from rolling in mud.
The next day, the Head Mistress issued a note to all parents advising them not to give their children pens to write with until the school management decided it was time to do so.

Bright, mystical and classy. Just the way I like it.
Yup, it needs a lot of editing to make it what I want, but how is it? :)
... I'm back.
After weeks of back-breaking work, tension, project meetings, interviews, lows more than highs, confidence-threatening situations, I can't say I've come out unscathed. Life is tough! Glad as I am that I'm able to take it all in pretty well, I wish I could go a step higher and be calmer, and not think of unnecessary things and situations. I find myself worrying sick sometimes, until I just shake myself up and say that when some things aren't in your hands, there's no point worrying yourself over them.

Unceremonious rants with my friends and parents when I contradict myself to the greatest extents possible ('I'm scared I'll be disappointed, but I know there's no point in being scared that I'll be disappointed; it's not in my hands, but yeah, it is in my hands considering I should try to not to let this affect me' - that's just a sample!) just show how foggy my mind is at the moment. Well, at the end of such monologues I just end up laughing wondering how I could get this crazy!

I keep thinking of all that I told my interviewer - that I'm optimistic, and never let difficulties bog me down - and wow, how much this helps in putting me back on track! At the end of it all, hope wins. As I wait with bated breath for something that could make or mar my confidence, I also desperately try by the side to make sure whatever happens, I don't lose hope or the trust in myself. After all, who knows me more than I do; somebody's judgment should have no effect!

I know, again, it's one of those senseless posts - I just wanted to vent everything running in my mind right now. I should be feeling much better by the end of this week, or by the end of the day, rather. Let's see what future holds in store for me. After all, everything happens for a reason - and the reason will be good!

P.S.: Thanks all, for still seeing what I'm up to..this is the longest ever break I've taken from blogging, and I can see what it's done to me - I missed it dearly!