Bollywood Blunders

As I desperately searched for newer music to keep me going while studying something as ‘interesting’ as accounting, I realised there were many Hindi songs that I liked but didn’t have. So I downloaded them from my friend’s computer, and sat down with the huge book with a flourish, with all the songs in my playlist.

I was happy for about half an hour to listen to those songs after a long time, for a while, but beyond a point, I started getting irritated. I don’t know why (pardon some bias from my side too) but every song began to sound similar to some other song I had in the list.

I have to confess I don’t like Hindi that much, I have no idea why, that I wouldn’t speak it unless in dire situations when I can’t get myself understood in any other way. Having lived in the South all my life, my only regular input of Hindi was from the (many-a-time sickening) Bollywood movies.

I watched, as SRK aged and still played a Rahul or Rohit or Raj and heroines were still Pooja or Priya. I watched as random people came in and out doing things in the name of comedy. I watched as Bollywood-ians rejected songs or movies generally deemed as hit or critically claimed elsewhere.

And years later, even now, nothing seems to have changed. Bollywood remains the same, only more sophisticated. Once in a while, someone gives something worth watching like Swades, RDB or Black. Otherwise, Bollywood continues in its same annoying monotone, churning out movies like Veer-Zaara, Mohabattein or the more recent Fanaa. Interesting story lines these movies have, but they falter in an unimaginable way and come down crumbling like a pack of cards, well at least in my opinion.

And hence, I’ve taken a vow that I will never watch a Bollywood product in the cinema unless it has good songs, so I don’t feel like I’ve wasted good money on something utterly useless – at least I have the songs to look forward to.

Talk about the songs – oh my God, there are just hand-countable songs that are fresh. Every other song has pyaar, deewana, jadu, marna kisi ke bina, rasta kho jana, dil dena, or jeena and well, you get the drift. The dholak or the tabla inevitably enters at some point in the song, and at least once you’ll find women in the background crooning la-la-la’s, hmm-hmm-hmm’s or something. Seriously, for once, I even appreciate Harris Jeyaraj’s Zulos and Iska maskas. At least he’s more imaginative with the humming.

Oh well, God show Hindi movies a way. Every time I realise that some only-watch-Bollywood-movies people don’t know about some movies down South, I feel bad that they are missing some good stuff. Maybe we need subtitles for all Indian movies released all over. I feel bad for the only-Bollywood-movies watchers.
Bollywood should just get more creative.